Who are the members and why are they here?
Members are all kinds of people from all walks of life: wives, husbands, lovers, sisters, brothers, children and parents of alcoholics. No matter what our relationship has been with a problem drinker, we share a common bond: we feel our lives have been deeply affected by another person's drinking. We meet together to share our experience, strength, and hope.
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How will it help me?
You will probably hear about a situation much like your own. If you don't find someone with the same set of circumstances, you may still be able to identify with the way many of us feel about the effects of alcoholism on our lives. We are all individuals striving to become the best people we can, each in our own way. That way is not the same for each of us, but there is help for everyone whose problem is alcoholism in others.
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How do I find a meeting?
To find a meeting in Suffolk County, please visit our meeting list for meeting locations and times. You can also call our phone service 1-800-766-5079. For Meeting located in other NY areas or Nationwide, please check our Contact page for contact information.
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Where are the meetings held?
Meetings are held at local schools, churches and hospitals. Meetings are held 7 days a week, both day and night. Meetings offer a safe place where people can come and talk about dealing with the effects of alcoholism in a friend or loved one.
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What is discussed at a meeting?
Meetings are when Al-Anon members meet together, and talk about dealing with the effects of alcoholism in a friend or loved one. At group meetings, we share our experience, strength, and hope with one another, keeping the focus on ourselves and the Al-Anon tools of recovery. There is no requirement to share.
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Do I have to say anything?
If you wish to speak, please do. If you would rather sit and listen, that's all right, too. There are no musts in Al-Anon. We try to listen to each other with an open mind. We also say, "Take what you like and leave the rest."
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Will anyone say I've been here?
Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of our program. It provides a safe place for members to share. We use first names and last initials. We do not talk about the people we see, or repeat what we hear at meetings. We guard the anonymity of all Al-Anon/ Alateen and AA members.
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Is this a religious fellowship?
Al-Anon/Alateen is a spiritual fellowship, not a religious one. Members of any faith, or none at all, are welcome and we make it a point to avoid discussion of specific religious beliefs. The Al-Anon program is based on the spiritual idea that we can depend on a "Power greater than ourselves" for help in solving our problems and achieving peace of mind. We are free to define that power in our own terms and in our own way.
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Does Al-Anon/Alateen have professional counselors or therapists?
Al-Anon offers a non-professional mutual support program of recovery.
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Can Al-Anon/Alateen recommend treatment centers?
Because we are non-professional we do not recommend sources of outside help. Through sharing of our personal experiences, members gain insight into dealing with their own situations.
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Who is responsible for the group?
We all are. We elect group officers to serve for short periods of time, perhaps three months to a year. In giving service to Al-Anon, as part of our recovery program, members volunteer to lead meetings, set up the room, display the literature and fill other group needs. At an Institutions and beginners group, experienced members lead the meeting.
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Are there other groups like this?
Our group is one of many thousands of Al-Anon and Alateen groups in more than 110 countries around the world. We are tied together through a World Service Office (WSO) in Virginia Beach which acts as a clearinghouse for ideas and service. In the U.S. and Canada, each group belongs to a district and an assembly area. The group representatives meet and elect delegates to the annual World Service Conference. (Refer to Al-Anon/Alateen Service Manual P-24/27).
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How much is this going to cost?
There are no dues or fees to join an Al-Anon or Alateen group. Most groups do pass a basket at meetings and we put in what we can afford to contribute on a voluntary basis. We use the money to pay the rent for a meeting place, to provide Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature for the group, to buy refreshments, and to support our local and worldwide service centers.
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How are meetings set-up?
All meetings start at a specific time; most last about an hour or so; some have no formal closing time. You can come into a meeting or leave anytime you choose. Many members come early to greet newcomers and talk to friends, and stay after the meeting to socialize and answer questions. Newcomers walk away from a meeting with Al-Anon literature, which has lots of useful information about dealing with alcoholism in a relative or close friend, and a list of local meetings, together with a list of phone numbers of members in the group who they can contact between meetings, if they need help.
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Now what do I do?
We Al-Anon and Alateen members found it helpful to:
- Obtain a meeting schedule.
- Go to meetings.
- Talk to each other before and after meetings.
- Exchange phone numbers.
- After awhile, you may wish to ask a longtime member to be your sponsor - a special friend, with whom you can continue sharing your personal feelings.
- Read Al-Anon and Alateen books, pamphlets, our magazine, The Forum, and Al-Anon and Alateen newsletters.
If you still have questions, feel free to ask them. We offer you our friendship and our understanding.
Please Keep Coming Back.
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